ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY

So now then. Here we are. One year and 8,000 hits later and I'm still writing this damn blog. It sure has been interesting. This blog has provided a great deal of fun and insight as well as distraction to my life (not to mention some pretty wacky drama on occasion), and I'm glad more often than not people enjoy the posts.
A lot has changed in the last year, B"H. Unfortunately a lot hasn't. I broke up with a girl exactly two days after the infamous (pitiful?) first post last March, and have had only one relationship that I would barely consider significant since. Otherwise it's been a handful of shiduch dates and one bummer of a crush I'll get to in a bit. Though things are definitely in turmoil in my life right now, one major difference in my life right now is that I'm substantially spiritually stronger now, and G-d willing I'll stay that way. I've made some new great friends and parted ways with some not-so-great friends. Such is life.
When I started this blog it was all about that awful breakup I had about a year and half ago. It was one of the two most painful things I've ever had to go through in my life. Not trying to be dramatic there, just honest. Anyone who's ever had a broken heart knows how difficult it is, and how time is really the only cure. I have no idea where she is in life (despite a false accusation last June), engaged, married, happy, sad, NY, NJ, FL,Israel..? Don't know. But I do wish her the best and a life time of health and happiness. I often wondered how I would know for sure that I had managed to move on (even though we all know a small piece of you never really lets go) ? I felt detached from everything that had happened, had dated other girls, and made zero effort to contact her in over a year. The evidence seemed to be building up, but then came the case breaker.
About two months ago I saw a girl I knew of from college eating in a bagel store near work. She would always be there on the same day at the same time, as would I. Finally after a month of being a pathetic loser I finally worked up the courage to talk to her. It went ok. I was nervous, a tad charming, but managed to break the ice. I figured next time I'd just ask her out. Now I really liked this girl, she was completely striking, yet cute, came off as being sharp yet sweet, and she was the first girl in almost four years that really excited me (other than the Ex obviously). I really couldn't wait to see her again. As my continuously crappy luck with the ladies would have it I'm still waiting. About two days after I finally talked to her the bagel place went out of business!! The king of all bummers.
Now I did everything I could think of to try to get in touch with her. I'm pretty confident I asked everyone I knew if they knew her. With a few exceptions of "of her" not one person did.
I thought I had found her email off of Only Simchas, so I wrote her a very innocent email, but got no response (and I dafka asked for one just so I could be sure I at least got her). When we spoke she mentioned where she works- which happened to be Right next door to where a good friend of mine lives, so I had an excuse to be there (even if its only four blocks from the office). There was only one thing left to do. I went down there. I worked up a shocking amount of courage and finally got the guts to walk into the hospital where she works..... but went into the wrong building (apparently there's more than one radiology department). The determined Romeo in me was spent for the day so I came back two days later. I went to the right building but she didn't come to work that day. So I went back the next day with a not to leave for her, but she had switched her shift and had left, and I couldn't leave a note they oddly said. I finally went down one last time today but she was no where to be found, and I think I have to finally give up :( Too much time has passed for her to remember a brief chat in a bagel store a month ago. Hopefully Hashem will allow for another chance encounter, but I feel like I did do all that I could to find her (without being a stalker), so I can't be upset with myself. If anyone has any suggestions please let me know.The other silver lining, that really sums up the whole post, is that going all out to try and make this happen really made me see that I had come quite a long way in the last year. It was exciting to be excited in that way again. But I'm still frickin bummed out. Damn you Bagel Bites!!!!